Author Archives: Tom Scanlon
No “Amityville Horror” terrorizing or “The Shining” bloodbaths in Prescott, where lodging ghosts seem more ready to charm than harm. Daily Courier story
Your contribution of as low as $1 and as high as infinity will help me make society a less annoying place to live.
We must stop this, NOW, before it’s too late!
White House insider says Prez’s “you can keep your doctor under the new plan” quote was “taken out of context. He meant you can always stay on close terms with your doctor — there’s absolutely nothing in the Affordable Care … Continue reading
a) Extended Happy Hour b) Casual Friday c) “Twates” (Twitter Dating) d) Medical Marijuana To Treat Colds (“Stone a Cold, Tweak a Fever”) e) Unattended Kids Running and Screaming Through Stores
Pussy Riot in turn stages protest concerts, pledging “we won’t stop playing in churches until he takes off our T-shirt!”
Outdoor rallies across Midwest, claiming “extreme cold temperatures disprove — again — the Global Warming Obamamyth!” Rallies deemed a success, though dozens of Tea Partiers taken to ER’s for pneumonia and flu-like syndromes.
Presidential announcement coming soon: “Anyone who makes a Black Friday purchase of insurance on the ACA exchange will receive, in addition to deep discounts on excellent plans, two free co-pays.”
Found a couple creepy, hand-written lists (I’ll save the “Best Scarey Movies” for Halloween) on an empty table at Scottsdale’s Mustang Library: My Favoritest Movies, Ever 1) The Psycho. “The Shower Scene” has to be the sexiest, ever! This is … Continue reading
According to unconfirmed reports, dozens — and possibly scores — of applicants for the so-called “Obamacare” health-care reform are becoming so frustrated by applications that suddenly delete, options that take forever to show up and other problems with crashing Affordable … Continue reading
At massive Tea Party meeting, many proudly displaying wearing grenade vests. Thundering applause to keynote speaker Ted Cruz, who declares, “Obamacare is Satan!” Breakout workshops include “Russian Roulette: A Primer,” “Six Hundred Sixty Six Reasons Why Obamacare is Evil” and … Continue reading
Tom Scanlon’s writing projects blog . . . “Writing projects,” does that sound like a high school homework assignment, er what?
Or the worst? Either way, this will be a benefit, with all proceeds going to North Beach PAWS (in memory of the great Joan Baus) and the Ocean Shores Food Bank. Tentative subtitle is “From Mayor Pie Fight Challenge to … Continue reading
Now I know the excitement tinged with anxiety of NCN letter submitters: Will my little missive be selected for publication? Oh, the suspense!
And newspapers wonder why they lose readers . . . Letter to the NCN Editor, and his response: LETTER TO EDITOR Mr. Bruscas, I was sorely disappointed by your recent editorial regarding the motion made by Council member Schroeder to affirm … Continue reading
*Pope Approves Gay Marriage *North Korea Threatens to Blow Itself Into Annihilation: “We Have the Technology and the Will” *”A Gun in Every Backpack”: New NRA Plan Unveiled *Ocean Shores Mayor Crystal Dingler Gets New Title: City Administrator (Pay of … Continue reading
Another strange “Bucket List” has surfaced, this one found in the pocket of a battered leather jacket at the Aberdeen Salvation Army. It reads: Things 2 do before I OD: 10) Give my parole officer a wedgie 9) Find a … Continue reading
USGS earthquake site here. If you
Is this just a scary-sounding pre-April Fools joke, or a legitimate threat? I’m hoping it’s the former, but something makes me wonder about this email from an obviously fictitious email address (email@example.com) Scanlon: Shut down your blog. SHUT IT DOWN … Continue reading
Things to do . . . before I go bankrupt: 10) Already did a Sewer LID and Street LID — how about an Air LID? 9) Build a new Police Station that’s twice as big as the Fire Station. 8) … Continue reading
The following was found in a leather jacket donated to an auction in Beverly Hills. It is believed to be a “Bucket List” written by a Hollywood stunt man. Things To Do Before I “Clock Out”: 10) Wrestling an alligator. … Continue reading