World’s Second-Most Depressing “Bucket List”

Another strange “Bucket List” has surfaced, this one found in the pocket of a battered leather jacket  at the Aberdeen Salvation Army. It reads:

Things 2 do before I OD:

10) Give my parole officer a wedgie

9) Find a job where I  get paid but don’t have to go

8) Take so dope if feels like skydivin

7) Slash every tyre in Aberdeen and Hokie

6) Find that dude that owes me 20 bucks whatshisname?

5) Play with good musicians instead of myself

4) Floss

3) Go to Settle and piss on Kurts grave

2) Clim Mt Everis and shoot up on top

1) Rob every home in Ocean Shores!

About Tom Scanlon

Tom Scanlon started his journalism career as a sports stringer with the Pittsburgh Press (RIP) and Post-Gazette, then moved on to the Seattle Times, Mesa Tribune etc. He is the author of plays including "The Superhumans" and novels including "Ocean Shores Tourist Killer," "Atlantis City," and, now, "The Immaculate Jagoffs of Pittsburgh."
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